Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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