one two three fourrrrnication!
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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