Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
