All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Randomize
