If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
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