what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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