just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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