hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
