Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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