just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
