Can i not drive my cunt home
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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