i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
