Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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