i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
