no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
