Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
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