they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
