Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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