i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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