Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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