I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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