My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
wow bdsm is so cute
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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