ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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