Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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