have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
