It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
