Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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