I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
