Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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