my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
