You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
