Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize