so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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