bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
