Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Randomize