you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I stole a fireplace last night.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
