Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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