His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
