hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
