"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
