so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
