So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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