i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
