uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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