He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
