i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
