that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
it hurts more in the daytime
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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