i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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