It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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