There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
